How to be a real and true friend

Lasting friendships are one of life’s real prizes, however, to achieve this is, not an easy feat. I am very thankful to consider myself blessed with lasting friendships with family and friends. I pray these relationships only grow and deepen. However along life’s journey, inevitably there are always some friendships that just simply do not stand the test of time. There’s that saying; ‘some people come into your life for a reason, some a season and some a lifetime.’ I very much agree with this saying and strongly believe that in fact, it is a good thing that all relationships are different and that each comes with their lessons and blessings. In fact, through certain friendships coming to an end, it has made me cherish the relationships I have with loved ones even more.

I do not have a magic formula for how to be a real and true friend. Every day I learn more about this and I’m sure we all do. What I do know is that if we want to keep our friendships, we must all try our best to be good friends. A true friend loves you even when you are not loveable. Like any human, I have had these times. The gratitude I feel to the ones who have stuck by me is immeasurable. On the flip side, there have been dear ones in my life who have gone through rocky times. I am not a saint. It is not easy to be there for someone when they difficult. But when you love that person and know that person has a good heart, that is what keeps you from giving upon them.

In today’s day and age where everybody is so crazy busy with their partners, families, work, side hustle, etc., it gets increasingly difficult to set aside time to catch up with friends, talk less of meeting up with them. What I’ve started doing is to set aside time in my diary to holler at my friends, and set aside time to meet up as well. I’m very thankful for the life I have because I have loved ones in all different places, but of course, it makes it that much more difficult to see them. But like everything else, if you plan, it most certainly can be done.

It can be scary being in a friendship and letting that person see the real and true you. When I was younger, I felt I had to adapt a lot to suit certain people. Even though there are situations where I still do just that to this day (work mode Trician and turn up Trician are opposites!) when it comes to friendships, if you do not like the person I am, there is not much more we can do here honey. Getting to be let in into people’s lives is such a privilege because not everyone gets that opportunity. It’s our responsibility to put the work in to keep our friendships strong. May we never take them for granted!

Finishing off, I asked a couple of friends, what makes someone a real and true friend and these were their answers along with my own:

• A true friend is someone who understands you in your entirety, they know your flaws but love you despite them. A true friend is not afraid to offend you by telling you the truth even when it hurts.

• Loyalty and someone who accepts you even when you’re going through changes, someone who just loves you regardless of the circumstances.

• Someone is a real and true friend when they love you for you and I mean for the good parts and the bad parts. when they support you and most of all when they tell you the truth. even the truth you don't want to hear. someone who has your best interest at heart.

• someone is a real friend when they understand you and have no judgments. when they have your back in person and behind closed doors. when they look out for you no matter what. it's not always gonna be good days, you will argue but they will never leave your side.

• Someone who you can talk to about anything without being judged. someone who will give their opinion and tell you the truth anytime.

• someone who you can rely on at times when you're on your face, someone who will ride for you no matter what.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEST FRIEND DENISE